Well, despite the threat of my cycle trying to peek through, I have been able to exercise as scheduled since last Tuesday!! I am so proud of myself for the first week is usually the hardest. I feel really good and determined!
Now comes another hard challenge. A trip.
That has to be one of the hardest for me aside from a bad cycle.
I will of course take my Shakeology with me, so that will definitely help. I'll take the Power90 cd, the stretch cord and workout clothes. I am determined to exercise while there AND to eat right! I think I may be able to do it this time.
I heard someone say the other day that the trick to losing weight is 80% what you eat and 20% exercise. I really am not so sure that is so. At least, not for me. I proved that with Nutrisystem. Well, you might be able to lose weight with just Nutrisystem, so maybe they are correct, it is 80% what you eat. BUT!
And that is a HUGE BUT!! The weight you lose is so fast, it's not where or -how- you'd like! Please see my other blog posts on that! If you do it that way, you will deflate and your skin will hang. If you do not replace that fat with muscle and let your body slowly adjust in a more gradual way, that's what happens, you deflate like a tire. It is so very tempting to order Nutrisystem but there is no way I want my breasts to deflate. I know I will not let that happen like that again. I thought about working out still, continuing with Power90 and do the Nutrisystem but I still feel I would deflate too fast. I would not be able to build up the muscle fast enough to replace that fat.
I NEED to learn to eat better. That's more important than the quick fix. I just finished off the rest of the cereal I was eating, a hearty whole grain with raisins and dates. Tomorrow, I'll start to do Shakeology in the mornings. Then I am going to try to cut out the breads and pasta. Stick to salads and steamed veggies and fish for lunch and dinner. I feel like I am still at a standstill but I know I can't go by the weight. Still at 198. I waver to 197.5 but it's not moving much. So time to be a bit more strict and to take measurements which I haven't done yet for a while. I need to do so and log it in today. Start to take the measurements each week so that I can get encouragement there.
It was nice to see two people 'like' my post of going to workout. :) It gave me a lil pat on the back for doing so and for doing so, so late in the day. That has to end as well. I did look at the pre-set schedule on WOWY for Power90 and it looks like they have you move to the blue disk after the 4th week of the yellow one! That's good! I have always wondered when exactly to move over although I figured it would be when you felt you had mastered the yellow one. So, that means, after today, I have exactly 3 weeks to go before the blue disk!!! That's exciting! A good goal and something to look forward to.
I did feel really good about completing the workout yesterday as I took a shower, I kept thinking to myself, "You are doing it Wanda!!" Yesterday, I saw an ad on Craigslist for a woman in my area who said she is a 6 star diamond type of coach for BeachBody and she was offering for anyone to be a coach and how you make money and all that. It sounds interesting, I'd prefer to be my own coach!
She talked of P90X however. Oh boy...I am not ready for that one yet. I need to finish Power90 first. So I am thinking perhaps, after I do so, I'll go ahead and jump to P90X and become a coach! It will be a good reward for completing Power90!!....aside from new clothes!
Yes! New clothes!! I need them and to get out of the frump that was in my closet! I have taken out most of my old things and made room and have to get thru the other clothes on the floor. Finish sorting thru everything and close my eyes and toss more stuff. As I lose weight, I know I'll be able to fit into nicer clothes too and I am excited about that!
First thing is first however, get past these two hurdles that I am facing right now, the trip and an oncoming cycle!
I really want to do this....how many times I've said that...how many times I've fallen by the wayside. I feel this is the crucial moment however, down to the last few months I really can. For I know I will soon have to go see my doc and get retested for the cholesterol. Oh man, I am so not looking forward to that. So I HAVE to lose this weight. I HAVE to get into better shape. I keep thinking in my mind of how much happier I will be and oh to walk in the sunshine with a wind blowing some frilly or fluttery skirt...I keep picturing myself like that. Silly maybe, but I do. I want to be trim and I know I'd feel so much lighter.
I know that making better food choices and exercising, is really the best thing for me. It would mean a lifestyle change and there would be nothing to transition from food wise. I would already be doing it. So end of the cereal, even if it is 'good for you' type. I think I need to find something different than that yogurt too. I do like the nuts and half an apple for the other snack tho'. I'll keep that one.
I'll look on the suggested items for Shakeology's list of snacks and see if I can find something better.
I want to get away from dairy and from the breads, cereals and pasta and also the red meat, as much as I possibly can. I want to stick with chicken and fish, fresh fruit and veggies. I really think that is the way to go and I need to look out for the portion control.
Those are my food goals.
Once I get those two in order, food and exercise, everything else should fall into place! :)
Wish me luck!
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Friday, January 20, 2012
Sharing A Pink Ribbon Story
My mother was diagnosed with breast cancer when she was in her 40s. She was very heavy, overweight and large breasted. I am uncertain as to why she let the lump go in her breast as long as she had but she did. Could be fear or not wanting to know or face it, I have no idea. My father found the lump and it was the size of a golf ball. My mother had very large, long breasts. After having four girls and already being a bit of a big woman coupled with her sweet tooth and lack of exercise and perhaps genetics, she became overweight.
I remember my father often challenging her to lose her weight by offering trips or a cruise and she would make an effort but eventually gave up. She would huff and puff just going up the street as she was so out of shape.
Unfortunately, the cancer, once found and diagnosed, had gotten into her lymph node under her arm and so they had to remove her right breast. I remember how devastated she was and how ugly she felt. Losing a breast of that size, threw off her sense of balance as well and then the chemo thinned her hair. She wore wigs until it grew in a bit more. She always had thin hair to begin with and the chemotherapy did not help. I remember her getting radiation treatments and how tan her upper chest got from it.
I remember the trouble she had in finding a fake breast to put into her bra. It was hard to find one the right size. Either she found one that was similiar in size but it had a lil pocket in it and so it would make this flop noise as it hit against her chest when she walked or it was a silicone gel type that was just too small and she was lopsided. It was a nasty scar too from what I remember.
Beyond the aesthetics, this took a toll on my mother's self esteem and I won't forget the anguish and pain she felt and how awful she felt about herself after the surgery.
She was alright health wise afterwards for about a year or so and then cancer reappeared in her legs as bone cancer. We were told, that it was only a matter of time and all they could do about the bone cancer was to try to slow it down and make her as comfortable as possible.
I remember the many visits to the doctors and hospitals for her. I remember her limping and using a cane or walker and she felt so limited as it hurt for her to walk. My mother was always so strong and always was doing things, keeping busy, but now, she could not and barely could get out of bed to go to the bathroom. We put a port-a-potty into the room for her and her bed was moved downstairs into the living room as she could not take the stairs.
She had seen a chiropractor for the pain and I remember being shown how to push my elbow into certain places on her legs and her buttocks, on pressure points, to try to help alleviate the pain. My mother would scream out there in bed when I did this and I hated it. It was awful. I always felt I was just causing her more pain instead of lessening it.
The cancer moved up from the bones in her legs and travelled up her spine and eventually got to her brain and she was placed into the hospital and then had tumors form on her skull.
I was 17, in Earth Science class when the call came. Before the teacher could tell me what it was or who it was for, I turned to my best friend Penny and told her, "That's for me, to tell me that my mother died."
I just knew.
I felt rather numb at the time. I was prepared for it as she was in the hospital and I had gotten to see her a day or two before. I was able to tell her I loved her and I remember she could not talk much with all the tubes.
It was very hard to watch my mother die like that. Waste away from cancer. To go from a woman who was always so strong to her body becoming so weak. Cancer is such a horrible disease and so hard on the body and mind with how debilitating it is, not to mention how hard it is on the loved ones to watch their family or friends die like that.
My mother died in 1982. She was 49 years old.
I am now 46 and I was told by my father and I can see for myself in the pictures of her, that I am built just like my mother.
I have had many mammograms and been getting them yearly now since I was in my 30s. I keep a close watch on my breasts and it's hard to check them for I have fibercystic breasts so I have to have the doc check them once a year as well as myself. I know that I am in much better shape than she was as I am more active, yet I do worry about getting cancer like she did. It used to be a theory of mine that the cancer fed on the fat in her body, although I do know that skinny people do get cancer too so that theory went out the window. But still, it is another driving point for me to keep up the fight with the battle of the bulge, just in case that has anything to do with it and also I believe if I am more fit and stronger, that my body might be able to keep it away or fight it better.
I do have a cyst in my right breast although it is not cancer, thank goodness. I've had scares but so far, so good.
It was my father's belief that my mother always wore bras that were too small and did not fit her properly and I try to be mindful of that as well, even if that sounds far fetched.
I also know my mother ate a lot of fish from rivers where there could have been mercury or poisoning within them that could have caused the cancer. No idea. We'll never know.
On top of this, my aunt, no blood relation, but was married to my father's younger brother, got the same type of cancer as my mother and she went through the exact same thing. She was built similiar to my mother as well and often we all went camping and fishing together as a family. My aunt died about 20 some years ago herself as the cancer ravaged her body and I think she had it even worse.
I can only hope that I will not get cancer or if I do, it will be caught soon enough so that it may just get removed and I will be ok and can be a cancer survivor. I used to always say as a kid that if I ever got breast cancer, after the grieving process of losing my breasts, I would then turn around and get several different sizes of breasts. One day, I could be the size 34A and wear the skimpy sexy outfits I never could and then the next day, I'd be a nice 38D and wear the hot outfits for larger breasted women too. My way of coping with the fear of it happening to me.
I know all I can do is to take good care of myself, get check ups with the doc regularly and encourage my daughter to do the same as she also, is built like me.
The whole experience with my mother, who never got to see me have kids, never saw me get married and I never got to talk to her about her pregnancies, her life, or other women things that I would have loved to have talked to her of now that I am a grown woman...all of that, made me wish to share of all the knowledge I can and have with my daughter before she goes out into the world. I know I can't give her experience as that is for her to live her life and do, but I can share all the knowledge and wisdom I can with her that I do have. For life is fleeting and sometimes you never know what may happen the next day. So many things I wish I could turn and talk to my mom about. To sit down with her and have a good conversation and ask her of her life. She was a very closed person, sadly. So there is a lot that I do not know and did not get to share with her.
I was never close to my mother when I was a young girl. But I am extremely close with my daughter now and I am all the more blessed for that and grateful. In a way, I like to think that my mother is watching and smiling to see me have this special bond with my daughter for it is what I wished we could have had, my mother and I. But I know she would be proud of my girl and that we are taking better care of ourselves.
This is why I have the penguin with the pink ribbon on this site in support of breast cancer awareness.
I also purchase pink things now and then in support of it and think of my mother.
I miss you mom.
I remember my father often challenging her to lose her weight by offering trips or a cruise and she would make an effort but eventually gave up. She would huff and puff just going up the street as she was so out of shape.
Unfortunately, the cancer, once found and diagnosed, had gotten into her lymph node under her arm and so they had to remove her right breast. I remember how devastated she was and how ugly she felt. Losing a breast of that size, threw off her sense of balance as well and then the chemo thinned her hair. She wore wigs until it grew in a bit more. She always had thin hair to begin with and the chemotherapy did not help. I remember her getting radiation treatments and how tan her upper chest got from it.
I remember the trouble she had in finding a fake breast to put into her bra. It was hard to find one the right size. Either she found one that was similiar in size but it had a lil pocket in it and so it would make this flop noise as it hit against her chest when she walked or it was a silicone gel type that was just too small and she was lopsided. It was a nasty scar too from what I remember.
Beyond the aesthetics, this took a toll on my mother's self esteem and I won't forget the anguish and pain she felt and how awful she felt about herself after the surgery.
She was alright health wise afterwards for about a year or so and then cancer reappeared in her legs as bone cancer. We were told, that it was only a matter of time and all they could do about the bone cancer was to try to slow it down and make her as comfortable as possible.
I remember the many visits to the doctors and hospitals for her. I remember her limping and using a cane or walker and she felt so limited as it hurt for her to walk. My mother was always so strong and always was doing things, keeping busy, but now, she could not and barely could get out of bed to go to the bathroom. We put a port-a-potty into the room for her and her bed was moved downstairs into the living room as she could not take the stairs.
She had seen a chiropractor for the pain and I remember being shown how to push my elbow into certain places on her legs and her buttocks, on pressure points, to try to help alleviate the pain. My mother would scream out there in bed when I did this and I hated it. It was awful. I always felt I was just causing her more pain instead of lessening it.
The cancer moved up from the bones in her legs and travelled up her spine and eventually got to her brain and she was placed into the hospital and then had tumors form on her skull.
I was 17, in Earth Science class when the call came. Before the teacher could tell me what it was or who it was for, I turned to my best friend Penny and told her, "That's for me, to tell me that my mother died."
I just knew.
I felt rather numb at the time. I was prepared for it as she was in the hospital and I had gotten to see her a day or two before. I was able to tell her I loved her and I remember she could not talk much with all the tubes.
It was very hard to watch my mother die like that. Waste away from cancer. To go from a woman who was always so strong to her body becoming so weak. Cancer is such a horrible disease and so hard on the body and mind with how debilitating it is, not to mention how hard it is on the loved ones to watch their family or friends die like that.
My mother died in 1982. She was 49 years old.
I am now 46 and I was told by my father and I can see for myself in the pictures of her, that I am built just like my mother.
I have had many mammograms and been getting them yearly now since I was in my 30s. I keep a close watch on my breasts and it's hard to check them for I have fibercystic breasts so I have to have the doc check them once a year as well as myself. I know that I am in much better shape than she was as I am more active, yet I do worry about getting cancer like she did. It used to be a theory of mine that the cancer fed on the fat in her body, although I do know that skinny people do get cancer too so that theory went out the window. But still, it is another driving point for me to keep up the fight with the battle of the bulge, just in case that has anything to do with it and also I believe if I am more fit and stronger, that my body might be able to keep it away or fight it better.
I do have a cyst in my right breast although it is not cancer, thank goodness. I've had scares but so far, so good.
It was my father's belief that my mother always wore bras that were too small and did not fit her properly and I try to be mindful of that as well, even if that sounds far fetched.
I also know my mother ate a lot of fish from rivers where there could have been mercury or poisoning within them that could have caused the cancer. No idea. We'll never know.
On top of this, my aunt, no blood relation, but was married to my father's younger brother, got the same type of cancer as my mother and she went through the exact same thing. She was built similiar to my mother as well and often we all went camping and fishing together as a family. My aunt died about 20 some years ago herself as the cancer ravaged her body and I think she had it even worse.
I can only hope that I will not get cancer or if I do, it will be caught soon enough so that it may just get removed and I will be ok and can be a cancer survivor. I used to always say as a kid that if I ever got breast cancer, after the grieving process of losing my breasts, I would then turn around and get several different sizes of breasts. One day, I could be the size 34A and wear the skimpy sexy outfits I never could and then the next day, I'd be a nice 38D and wear the hot outfits for larger breasted women too. My way of coping with the fear of it happening to me.
I know all I can do is to take good care of myself, get check ups with the doc regularly and encourage my daughter to do the same as she also, is built like me.
The whole experience with my mother, who never got to see me have kids, never saw me get married and I never got to talk to her about her pregnancies, her life, or other women things that I would have loved to have talked to her of now that I am a grown woman...all of that, made me wish to share of all the knowledge I can and have with my daughter before she goes out into the world. I know I can't give her experience as that is for her to live her life and do, but I can share all the knowledge and wisdom I can with her that I do have. For life is fleeting and sometimes you never know what may happen the next day. So many things I wish I could turn and talk to my mom about. To sit down with her and have a good conversation and ask her of her life. She was a very closed person, sadly. So there is a lot that I do not know and did not get to share with her.
I was never close to my mother when I was a young girl. But I am extremely close with my daughter now and I am all the more blessed for that and grateful. In a way, I like to think that my mother is watching and smiling to see me have this special bond with my daughter for it is what I wished we could have had, my mother and I. But I know she would be proud of my girl and that we are taking better care of ourselves.
This is why I have the penguin with the pink ribbon on this site in support of breast cancer awareness.
I also purchase pink things now and then in support of it and think of my mother.
I miss you mom.
Another day down!
Or should I say UP!? I finished working out earlier and just got out of the shower. I almost didn't go up there and was going to put it off but then, I was like NOPE! I saw a Beachbody post about Insanity, one of their new programs and a young girl's results. I love to look at the before and afters! They really do give a lot of great inspiration to keep pushing play!
Eating is still not optimal, but I am getting there. It's one of those slow processes for me. I am nearly there however and it's exciting! This feeling of being on the verge of starting again and already, almost a full week of working out!! YAY! That is a big accomplishment. So many times I would wake in the morning and you just don't feel like doing it. Other times, I would wake up and bounce out of bed, just ready to go!
I notice however that if I don't do it first thing, then the excuses start to come. Then the day bears down on me and I get busy with work and all and then....here they come...excuse...excuse...and granted, some of them are valid! LOL
But some are not! :(
Good for me tho' in pushin play TODAY! It's gorgeous outside, an unseasonably 78! WOW! In the middle of January no less! That's Texas for you!
Just drinking down my Shakeology drink right now before taking my son to his dental appointment.
I feel so......FREE! So alive right now!! I love this high!!
I hope you all who read this, have a grand day!
Eating is still not optimal, but I am getting there. It's one of those slow processes for me. I am nearly there however and it's exciting! This feeling of being on the verge of starting again and already, almost a full week of working out!! YAY! That is a big accomplishment. So many times I would wake in the morning and you just don't feel like doing it. Other times, I would wake up and bounce out of bed, just ready to go!
I notice however that if I don't do it first thing, then the excuses start to come. Then the day bears down on me and I get busy with work and all and then....here they come...excuse...excuse...and granted, some of them are valid! LOL
But some are not! :(
Good for me tho' in pushin play TODAY! It's gorgeous outside, an unseasonably 78! WOW! In the middle of January no less! That's Texas for you!
Just drinking down my Shakeology drink right now before taking my son to his dental appointment.
I feel so......FREE! So alive right now!! I love this high!!
I hope you all who read this, have a grand day!
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